Church Notes | Out of the Ashes

The Lord has given me a word, something heavy on my heart, that this generation needs to restore honor to The Church. For far too long people who call themselves Christians have been doing hateful and fear-fueled things. Francis Chan's teaching on Sunday could not have been anymore timely. I really didn't know what restoring honor to The Church could looked like. Especially in the micro, in the macro it is very broad strokes of severing and loving the world as Christ did, but I was kind of at a loss for the intricate brush work of our everyday day-to-day. I do not want to come off like, "Ohhhhhh! I get it now!" Because I don't, I understand very little, but that is something I have realized this past year and a half. That I only understand what I need to, and in most of the cases what I am ABLE to understand for this step of the journey. And to be 100% honest, do I need to know what is gonna happen 3 steps from now or do I just WANT to? Anywho I digress, back to things I am blessed with understanding in. The Church needs to rise the from the ashes of the idiots morons and selfish men and women who were Christians in name only. We will need to distinguish ourselves, and the ONLY was we can do that is through love! Sacrificial love. Intelligent love. Funny love. Gentle love. Bold love and so forth.

How to start this process? Look at your own hearts and ask the Lord to show you areas of pride and fear. Then ask Him to show you and how to replace those areas with trust, humility, and love. It won't be easy, but when has anything easy been memorable or powerful?






P.S. The drawing is supposed to represent coming out of ashes, and the Owl is something the Lord uses to speak to me, and they are cool, ANNNNND they are fun to draw. :D

Faithful

God is just so faithful!! He met me very specifically last week, but lets set the stage first.

First off, this deep into CIRCLES, most of you probably know that I like to draw during church. At first it was fun, and a good excuse/method to get some of my spiritual life in front of the eyes of the audience of the PodCast I am on.

Secondly, this past year has been a long and powerful journey. The tail end of which being a time of spiritual awakening. I know that this sounds dramatic, but just stick with me. The first step of this "awakening" was realizing and seeing the Spirits existing work in and around my life. Through and in things like my personality, history, talents, and struggles. This realization helped me to look at my personality, history, talents, and struggles with the Lord in mind. Seeing these things in the Light that only He can shead helped me to see Him in them. Seeing Him in them helped me realize that they are His, making it easier to give them back to Him.

Thirdly was learning the Power of choosing to have an expectant and humble heart. That is fertile soil for the Lord to sew His seeds.

The stage is now set, so lets rewind to the Sunday before last, April 3, 2011. On my way to RockHarbor I was having a conversation with the Lord about what He has been doing in my heart and mind. Specifically with how He has used my spiritual gifts in and through my drawings. I wasn't doubting His hand in it, or even questioning it. Because I KNEW He had been in it. I realize now as I sit here in Starbucks that I was challenging, or asking Him rather, if He was going to continue to use me in this manner. I left it at that, went to the Hangar to help set up. Met my friends in our regular spot in the Sanctuary on the left hand side under the good lighting (for drawing). Worshiped. Prayed. Worshiped. Etc. Then the study started, I prayed that I would be inspired to draw something, or be given an image. I sat and waited for a little while. Darin then said something about justice and I got an image. An image of a man holding scales. As I drew it it became more clear. It turned out to be our very own Zach! In the scales that he was holding there was a heart of flesh that was being out weighted by fruit. After the study I was serving with Zach in the Hangar and had the opportunity to share the drawing and what the Lord put on my heart about it with him. I always get nervous about sharing that stuff with people because I don't want to come off as, "THUS SAITH THEE LORD!!" That knee-jerk response is out of fear, not decrement. And fear is never to be reacted out of, so I did my best to die to myself and be bold. And I know and trust Zach, even if I was way off he wouldn't kill me. Long story a little bit shorter we had a great conversation about the drawing. At the end of the night he came back up to me and handed me a letter. When I got home to read it I was so blessed. It was really awesome. The Lord answered the questions I had earlier that night through Zach's letter.

Zach

I write this not to brag or anything like that at all. But to encourage. If you were to tell me a year ago that I would be writing this Blog today I would have been extremely skeptical, and probably thrown in an eye roll. The week prior to this story I was drawing and it turned out to be my brother, and when I called him to tell him about it we had the most wonderful and AWESOME conversation about what God was doing in each of our lives.

Be bold guys, and trust deeper! And expect the Lord to move. That give Him room for Glory and Honor in our hearts, and the hearts of the others around you!

I love you all.

my Brother

Church Notes | Blood Money

We are going thought a study that will take us up to Easter Sunday titled "Witness' of Christ". Each Sunday is focusing on a person that Christ encountered during the week leading to the crucifixion. So far we have met Mary Magdalene with her unexpected and extravagant manner of worshiping Christ. Encountered the Pharisees and saw how blind their hearts were when what they were looking for was right in front of them. And about 2 weeks ago met the man I am blogging about right now, the betrayer; Judas Iscariot.

For me Judas has been a source of mixed emotions. He was the man who betrayed Christ and then hung himself. I've always wondered why he betrayed Christ? And why he committed suicide and what did his suicide mean? For a long while I would wonder if he even had a choice.

But I realized that we can't really ask the question if he had a choice. We have to assume he did have choice, because we've all had choice, all of us from Eve to Adam to you and me. I truly believe that choice is a primary form that God's love takes in our lives. If we did have the ability to choose we would be incapable of love, and on a side note and slight tangent, that is why addiction is so evil, it mars our ability to choose, but thats a blog for another time so anywho...

I always thought as a child that Judas betrayed Jesus because be was greedy and was supposed to. What I realized in that study, and have been trying to blog about for the last 2 weeks, was that Jesus wasn't what Judas wanted him to be. Judas did not understand how this man was going to establish a new kingdom and he did not submit his understanding to the both the Scripture and the prophet standing in front of him. His pride and vanity stood in the way not allowing him to see Jesus as a true prophet, let alone the Christ and Son of God. Out of what we can assume to be immense frustration and bitterness he turned Jesus in to the authorities. Even after the crucifixion I don't think he recognized Jesus as the Christ. He said that he spilt the blood of an innocent man, not that the Blood of the son of God. I really think this line of thought is supported through the actions Judas took after his admission. He did not seek repentance and redemption, but wallowed in his own remorse incapable, himself, of solving the issue, and I really feel that that desperation and isolation is what opened his heart and mind to suicide.

Basically what I got from this study was that I need to be careful to not allow pride to blind me from seeing how Christ want to work in and through my life. And that there is a world of difference between remorse and repentance.

Wisdom

These is from February 6th, Super Bowl Sunday. I colored it weeks ago but I didn't make the time to write about it, so here goes.



Every year for the last 4 years I make plans to watch the Super Bowl with six of my best friends. This year we went back up to Apple Valley, where our friends Matt and Amy live. I always look forward to the time I can spend with my friends up there, but I especially look forward to talking with Matt. He is such a wise man and it just spills into every conversation he has. With all that the Lord has taught me shown me this year I wanted to be able to bless him or speak some truth into his life. So I prayed about that specifically before I went up. All six of us were sitting around, drawing, knitting, putting kids to bed, playing video games etc when they realized they were out of dog food. Matt was going to go to PetsMart and asked if anyone wanted to join him, everyone else said no but I felt the Lord say go, so I did. It was a great time of fellowship over buying a bag dog food. I had just listened to that episode of the Orbiter where Darin shared how someone told him he should be a teacher and not a singer. And how that man told Darin that he was already teaching, he was just doing it through his songs and shows. I knew that truth would find a home in Matt. Matt works at High Desert Church as a Graphic Designer and he is a teacher by nature. It's just right now he teaches via his designs. Matt approaches design differently, its not about how good it looks its about how effective the message is. I know that is the point of a good designer, but for most designers it goes like this; great design that doesn't distract from the message. For Matt the design is there support the message, and since the message is beautiful, compelling, and challenging the design is then beautiful, compelling and challenging. He is selfless in it. Long story short I asked him about pastoring and teaching and shared that story about Darin. A couple of weeks later he shared with me that he spoke with the leadership at his church expressing a desire to go down that path and try his hand in teaching or administration or something like that. I don't know exactly what it looks like, but they were receptive of it, and he said thanks recognized Gods hand in our conversation. I thought that was pretty awesome. Kids the message of today's blog post is be intentional with what the Lord is doing in your life!

As for the drawing this is my friend Matt. I know he has the gift of wisdom, and that wisdom grips his heart and gives him vision. So that's what the drawing is of.

Long Term and Short Term

I didn't get to to my blog last week except for the cat thumb video, which was awesome!, so here goes. My Here and Now one is to come.

I got some major clarity after speaking with Lindsay at Dannah's place on Febuary 27th. She asked me a question I got an answer to 8 years ago, the funny thing is that I didn't realize I was asking myself that question again! She asked me if I ever thought of working at a church doing art. When I was younger I was distracted by the question, "art or ministry?" Distracted so much so that I took nearly a whole year off of college and a whole a semester of Calvary Chapel Bible College classes at an extension campus in Diamond Bar. It took that whole year for me to understand what the Lord was trying to tell me. That He was going to use my art AS my ministry. So then I prayed about working at church and being a designer there. Then God gave me that job at my old church. I was part-time graphic designer for the last 2 years of college at my then church. It was awesome and powerful. So basically the Lord gave me my dream job when I was 22. I was forced to dream bigger, and forced to face the fact that my desires lay outside the church walls. Then I had to learn another lesson, that that is okay. It's okay that i want to draw for a living, it's okay that I feel called into the entertainment industry. He has given me keys to that kingdom, who not use them! Lindsay's question was needed, I was begging to separate art from ministry, when that is one in the same. And then God is just awesome, I see His hand setting things in place for me at DreamWorks. It's like I giant and powerful game of chess and I am content at being God's pawn. He knows what he is doing. One thing that especially stands out is a meeting I had last Wednesday with an old classmate. He is a story artist for DreamWorks so i asked if I could pick his brain. It was awesome, and it was even cooler hearing the Lord speak behind him, basically half of the time he was just a Muppet for the Lord. So much tactile wisdom came from that meeting. I got some VERY clear direction on what I am called to do. I am going to make long term and short term goals after my meeting tomorrow, Wednesday march 9, 2011 at 11:00am. Pray for me and keep me accountable.

The Blog that was a week in the making...

Hey Slices! You guys get to listen to me talk about this weeks drawing. My other blog got the notes on the sermon. The art stuff is more open to interpretation. The Lord has been using it as tool to sharpen the different spiritual gifts in me, and CIRCLES is a place for me to be much more vulnerable, candid, and open. Open for encouragement, correction and everything in between. So here goes!

The Drawing before PhotoShop.

These are a few spiritual gifts illustrated. Something you should understand is that I love symbolism! and over the last 6 months or so I've realize why. It's because the Lord uses, and has always used, symbolism to minister to me, just keep that in mind. This is what the Lord put on my heart to draw on Sunday. Now what only took about forty minuets to sketch took a lot longer to understand. The deeper true meaning of the sketch was unfolded to me thought out the week as I colored it and thought about what I meant. A quick side-note on how the Lord works. I find it really awesome that on Sunday all I was doing was drawing a fun picture and listening to an awesome sermon. I had no idea of the true meaning of the drawing while I was drawing it. Which is awesome because it wasn't at all a distract from the sermon. Not only did it distract me from the message it allowed it to follow me around all week! Okay so back to the drawings; the Owl is wisdom, the Eye made of the flaming tongue [like Pentecost] is decrement, the flowers growing out of the heart is joy, and the key I'm pretty sure is a form of healing. At first it was difficult for me to give meaning to all of them. But throughout the week the Lord has given me more and more, like on Wednesday I understood the flowers represent Joy. And as I was typing this I looked up the spiritual gifts on my iPhone interwebz and the Lord told me the key is a representation breaking bondage or a spiritual healing. Then the Lord continued to show me that these are the gifts he is nurturing in me right now. I was hesitating to share that at first, but I realized that was fear. So I am choosing to be bold here, and I trust the Lord with that. Thank you guys for letting me ramble about what's on my heart onto this blog.

The Drawing after Photo Shop

And you should all know that am starting to fall in love with all y'all.

Church Notes | Contentment

I have been wanting to color this for almost 2 weeks now, but I wasn't able to. I had some freelance that ate up all my time. This is from the service on contentment. The imagery was influenced from the end of The Voyage of the Dawn Treader, when they meet the star named Ramandu. I wrote a whole post about him earlier this month, I guess it just really inspired me.

Basically she is a star content with hanging in the night sky. Not needing to burn any brighter than her sisters. Content at playing her part in the symphony of lights in the sky. Resting in the balance of unity and uniqueness. We all need to strive to find our special place in the sky to burn brightly for the Lord.

I know I am cheesy, but I mean every syllable of it.

Chasing Cars

The other night at work they offered a life painting session form 6:00pm-9:00pm. Since I usually linger in Glendale anyways to miss traffic on my 47 mile commute I was all in! I was excited and nervous, I hadn't done thins kind of painting in ages! I was also excited for the quiet time this would provide. In a room filled with other people painting it is you are all alone together.

As I was painting I was praying that the Lord would speak to me. An hour or so goes by and nothing, so I rummage through my bag and get out my ear buds and plug them into my iPhone. I didn't know what to listen to, so I go to a playlist I made in the summer of 2009 called, "Songs I Like Right Now". Now for some back story on this particular playlist, this playlist in it's day was the "ish"! I was on tour that summer and had a LOT of down time driving from state to state to work on this sucker. All that to say that these were not just random songs. Back to painting! So I hit shuffle on that play list, "Chasing Cars" by Snow Patrol comes on. While listening to this I realized I liked this song a lot more back then. It was actually kind of annoying. I ask myself and God why is that? I used to love this song! Then the Lord spoke to me, He said, "You used to like this song because you had a similar wound as the men and women who created it. It spoke to you on an intimate level. Between now and then you have trusted me with that wound and I have healed it. Our intimacy eclipses shallow nature of what that song meant to you."

I was blessed and humbled by this revelation. Humbled in the since that I can now choose to be a little more patient when people tend to like songs, books, or movies that I find stupid.

I hope that made sense.

Some Recent Church Notes

The Lord gave me the week on New Years eve, it's an image of compromise. She is giving only a shard of her heart to the Lord.

This was a study on anxiety and worry. What I really loved about this study and never understood was that to be worried is to be double minded. That was such a powerful realization! This past year was a nightmare, I had so much anxiety. I was literally letting Satan and his brood tear my heart and mind into pieces. How I fought it was to choose humility and realize that I need to repent from these thoughts, feelings, and fears. I had to CHOOSE to pray against them.

This past weeks study was on guarding your mind against spiritual warfare. His spiritual eye is open and the Holy Spirit is upon him. The demon can not stand the the fact that he is focusing his mind on the Glory that is God. The concept here is that the eye is like the a combination of the Shekinah glory and the tongue of flames that rested upon the heads of the people at Pentecost.